Mutual Salvation
by BecAlora
Summary: Written for the 2010 Spring Fling Exchange on livejournal. "This is not an attempt for me to save you! This is an attempt to help you learn to save yourself." PW/HG One Shot


**Disclaimer:** This was written for the 2010 community exchange hp_spring_fling over at livejournal. It was one of my first ever rare!pairs. I cannot wait to see what you guys think of it. That being said, I do not own Harry Potter in any way. I'm not that amazing.

**Mutual Salvation**

She held the bottle of wine in her hand and his photo in the other. He was gone. He wasn't coming back to her like he promised and she would never be over it. Molly was much in the same state, or she had been for the first couple of months, but George had gotten her through it. George had tried to help Hermione, but she had only progressed further into depression. It had eventually gotten to the point where George stopped coming around and Hermione had stopped trying. She still went to work, but she did little else. What did it matter? Fred was dead.

So naturally it was a surprise when someone knocked on her door that night. It was half past one and it wasn't like Hermione's house was near people. In fact her house was pretty much isolated from most of the world. She almost didn't believe the knocking was real at first, because a) she was quite drunk and b) people had long since stopped visiting her.

She lay on the couch, still staring at his picture when the knocking became more insistent. So it definitely wasn't her imagination then. She did not feel like visitors so she yelled, "Go away." The person who was knocking obviously didn't speak English because they didn't listen, they only continued their annoying knocking. Sighing she stumbled to the door. She looked through the peephole and stood in shock for a moment. Out of all the Weasleys he was the last one she expected to see. Ron or Ginny maybe, and Bill and Charlie had both stopped by out of pity. Everyone showed up from time to time, except for him. She saw him at work. But that was pretty much it. "Hello Percy," She mumbled, trying not to slur her words.

Percy adjusted his glasses and coughed uncomfortably, "Ah, hello Hermione. May I come in?"

She turned and looked at her house, she hadn't bothered to clean in months. "I'm not exactly at my best now Percy. Could you come at another time?"

He peered around her, "No. This can't wait."

"Did Molly send you?"

"No. Look Hermione we need to talk."

Hermione snorted, "Percy, in case you haven't noticed I'm kind of drunk at the moment. This isn't the best time."

Percy laughed and scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, "When are you not drunk Hermione?"

"Just come back at another time okay? I promise we can talk then." Percy nodded once before turning on the spot and apparating.

Hermione stared at the place he had occupied and blinked. That had been very odd.

The next day at work she caught Percy staring at her. It felt very weird, though it wasn't like there was much for them to stare at in the tiny office that they shared. Whoever thought Kingsley Shacklebolt needed two Undersecretaries was clearly off their rocker. She stared back for a moment, before excusing herself to get the hell out of there.

She was halfway down the hall when Percy caught up with her. "I need you to come with me tonight."

"I, um, can't. I have an appointment."

"You mean you have another appointment with a cheap wine bottle?" he snapped. "I promise this is more important."

Hermione snatched her arm from his hand, "Does it really even matter?"

"Yes it does. We all lost him Hermione. Why won't you let us help you?" He choked out, trying to reign in his anger. In all the time he had known Hermione Granger he had never known her to just give up like this. It wasn't okay, it wasn't all right, and he'd be damned if he didn't fix this.

"He is dead. He has been dead for seven months, two weeks, and three days. I'm not ready to be over it yet." She looked at the floor as she mumbled, "I don't think I'll ever be."

Percy put his hand in hers and pulled her towards the lift, "Just come with me tonight. Only tonight. If you aren't helped by this, then I'll leave you alone. But just give me this one chance."

"Why now?" She spat, "Harry and Ron gave up a month ago. What makes you think you'll succeed aftef they've failed so gloriously?"

"Nothing makes me think I'll succeed. In fact I'm damn prepared to fail. But I have to try."

"Why are you trying now? Are you supposed to be the knight in shining armor to come and rescue me?"

Percy rubbed his temples in frustration, "This is not an attempt for me to save you! This is an attempt to help you learn to save yourself. I can't be anyone's savior Hermione, least of all yours, but I can damn well try to teach you to be your own."

Her mouth opened and closed much like the goldfish she'd had as a child, "I can't be saved. This is a kamikaze mission. Everyone who attempts fails. Have you ever failed at anything in your life?" She poked him in the chest, "Are you ready to fail now?"

Percy looked at her long and hard, "I have failed at something Hermione. I failed at saving my brother!"

He grabbed her hand and pushed her into the lift, "Do you know how he died Hermione?"

Hermione refused to meet his eyes, "Yes I do."

"Well then you know he died saving my life."

Hermione looked up and nodded. "He loved you. He thought you were a right git, but he loved you."

"I know." He wiped at his eyes angrily, "And now the only thing I can do is live my life and make sure his sacrifice was worth it. He would have wanted you to be happy. He loved you Hermione. And now I'm going to try to make sure that you are."

Hermione nodded numbly, "Take me to wherever the hell this place is."

Percy nodded and put his arm, "Okay."

Hermione did not like apparating, especially not side-along, and she especially did not like Percy holding onto her this tightly…or at least that's what she would keep telling herself. Truthfully it felt nice to be held like this again even if wasn't by the right person. When they landed she pulled away from him so fast that she fell to the ground. Refusing to look at Percy she looked ahead and her mouth dropped open, "You cannot be serious."

Percy nodded and took her hand, "Yes I am."

"How did you even know about this?" She pulled her hand away, "I thought this was only in the muggle world?"

Percy took her hand again and pulled her towards the building. "I've been going here for two years Hermione. You know wizards hit the firewhiskey a little too hard too." He looked at the rather nondescript building and furrowed his brows, "How do you even know what this is?"

"Everyone and their mum knows what this is and I do not need to be here." She tried to slap him and was infuriated when he stopped her hand and pulled her forward effortlessly. "Let me go!"

Percy continued to pull her forward, "You promised you'd try."

Hermione growled, "Didn't George inform you of his very sorry try at this?"

"Yes he did."

"So what makes you think I'm going to go in there with you?" She snapped, still struggling to pull her hand away.

Percy sighed and turned towards her abruptly. "You're going to go in there whether I have to carry you or you walk yourself."

"You're going to have to carry me. I am not walking in there."

"Have it your way then." He let go of her hand.

"Thank you." She was about to turn and apparate away when her world turned upside down. "Are you serious?"

Percy grunted as he threw her over his shoulder, "Yes."

She looked at the ground moving and tried to kick her feet, "Percy I do not want to go to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting."

"Tough shit. You're going."

And with that he took her in.

* * *

Hermione was slightly dazed as she left the meeting with Percy. She looked at him curiously. That meeting had challenged everything she'd ever thought about Percy. "So how exactly did you become an alcoholic?"

Percy put a cigarette in his mouth and lit it. He only ever smoked after a meeting. Cigarettes were a messy and nasty habit, but talking in that meeting always frayed his nerves. As he exhaled he shrugged, "A lot of things," he answered noncommittally, "but it was mostly the guilt over abandoning my family. At least that's how it started." He took a drag and continued, "Then Penelope left me for another woman and I just hit the bottle."

"What made you stop?"

"Fred did actually." At her furrowed brow he smiled, "He got called to pick me up by Tom. George refused to come, but Fred, he thought it would be funny to play pranks on me while I was drunk. He did. He really let me have it, but then he sat with me while I sobered up." Percy laughed bitterly, "I remember him smacking me on the head and telling me to stop. He told me that he wasn't going to let Mum have an alcoholic for a son. He took me to my first meeting."

Hermione rummaged through her memories, "Fred and I got together the summer after fifth year. How could he not tell me about this? About helping you? He was so mad at you."

Percy flushed, "I might have made a few uncouth remarks about you when I fell off the wagon about a month later."

"Why did you fall off the wagon?" She chose not to ask him about he had said. Tonight had been the first night she hadn't gone straight to the bottle. She didn't want to ruin that by hearing stupid things stupid people had said while they were drunk.

He took another drag of his cigarette, "Honestly?" He peered at her shyly.

She nodded emphatically. "Yes."

"I found out he was dating you."

Hermione's heart stopped. "Why would that matter?"

Percy stubbed the cigarette out in the ground, "We all have crushes Hermione." He refused to look her in the eye. "Mine just happened to be a well kept secret and a little more intense than it should have been."

Hermione felt her face heat up, "Since when?"

"Since the Quidditch World Cup."

She grew redder, "I was fourteen! You were nearly nineteen!"

Percy looked to the sky and searched for another cigarette, "I have eyes Hermione."

Hermione's chest tightened. "Well then…"

Percy looked everywhere but her. "Yeah, so I'm going to go now." He turned without looking at her. "I'll be by to pick you up next Monday."

Hermione could only mutter a quick, "Yes," before he apparated away.

The following two months were practically unbearable for Percy. He couldn't look Hermione in the eye, let alone speak to her. George had owled him the night after the meeting, asking what he had done to get Hermione to approach and talk to him. Percy still hadn't replied. Percy wasn't good with feelings. It was why Penelope had left and it was definitely why he had become an alcoholic. Drinking was better than dealing with his emotions. Feeling anything out of the ordinary was scary. And feeling what he felt for his dead brother's girlfriend…he really wished he wasn't on the wagon.

He picked her up for meetings every week, never talking, though she made awkward attempts at conversation. He didn't know what to say and even if he did, he had no idea how to look at her. She was still mourning Fred. It was inappropriate to try anything on her. He knew at least that in all this mess.

And if he talked he would try something on her. Yes she was damaged, but that made him want her more. He was damaged too. He could help her, he could make her happy, but not until she was ready. And right now she was not ready.

It was a on the Thursday of their meeting that a knock sounded on his door, "Let me in you git!" shouted a voice from the other side.

Percy sighed. It was George. He'd known this was coming. There was only so much ignoring he could do before his quirky brother would come around demanding answers. "Come in George." Percy said as he opened the door. He was dreading this conversation, but still he asked, "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Cut the shite Perce. I know. I've known for years." George replied as he sat at the kitchen table.

Percy narrowed his eyes, "I'm already miserable. Don't tell me you've come to make this worse."

George eyed him carefully, "Look I don't know what you did or what you said to her, but she's better. She smiles, she shows up at family functions. The only problem I see is you."

"And how is that?"

"You've been avoiding her."

"She needs space. And I do not avoid her. I'll be picking her up tonight."

George laughed, "Yes you will, but you won't say a single word to her. You haven't said anything other than hello, goodbye, and thank you to her for the past two months and I've come here to end that."

Percy's eyebrows went to his hairline, "And how are you going to do that?"

"You're going to talk to her tonight and stop acting like a nut or I'll hex you."

"It's better if I don't talk to her."

George snorted and smacked Percy on the back of the head, "You know you've got her in a complete state. She doesn't know what she's done to make you act this way and I'll be damned if I let you alienate her."

Percy threw a dish in the sink and breathed deeply, "She doesn't need me to make things even more confusing. She's not over Fred. She doesn't need me to come and make her life more complicated."

George threw the salt shaker at his head, very pleased when it made a nice thwack against the back of his head, "How do you know what's best for her?" Percy glared at him and sat at the table. "I mean really Perce you don't really ever get over the love of your life dying. The pain will always be there, but it fades over time, becomes a dull ache, and eventually you move on. If you would just talk to her you would know that she likes you back."

Percy looked up from the table, "What are you on about?"

"I'm saying to talk to her tonight."

"Or you'll hex me."

"Absofuckinglutely." George replied as he got up to leave. "Don't you have somewhere to be right now?"

Percy looked at the clock, "Right."

George smiled, "Good luck."

The meeting had ended and he was walking Hermione to her door. As she fumbled with her keys he scratched his neck awkwardly and asked, "Would you mind if I came in for a moment?"

Hermione dropped her keys in shock, "Are you actually talking to me?"

"Yes." He coughed, "Now may I please come in?"

Hermione nodded, giving up on her keys and using her wand to open her front door, "So what made you start-" She stopped speaking when she saw the look Percy was giving her, "Are you okay Percy? You look a little feverish."

Percy didn't say anything. His eyes moved to her lips and he blinked.

"Are you seriously ignoring me in my own house? Of all the stupid things you could-mmm!" She was shut up by the insistent pressing of Percy's lips on hers. She felt herself melt into the kiss. It felt like ages, but only seconds later he pulled away. She was dazed. Did he really just do that? She looked at him for a moment before slapping him, "Are you serious?"

Percy held his face for a moment working his jaw, "I rather thought I was. Did I do something wrong?"

"Yes!" Hermione pushed him off of her, "You don't say more than two words to me for several months and now you assault me in my house like nothing's wrong!"

"I did not assault you."

"Well maybe that was a little far, but normally people tell you they like you or have an actual conversation before they throw themselves at you."

Percy blushed, "I'm not so good with that Hermione."

"Well get good at it." She poked him in the chest, "We're going to do this again and you're going to actually speak before you do that whole thing again." She pushed him out of the door. "You're going to knock like a gentleman and ask to come in." She closed the door in his face.

Percy stared at the door in shock. Did she really expect him to knock on the door and try that again after she nearly dislocated his jaw?

"I'm waiting." Her voice said from the other side of the door.

Percy raised his hand to knock on the door. Was he really going to listen to her? He smirked. Yes he was.

This bossiness was kind of a turn on. He knocked.

The door opened and Hermione appeared, "Hello Percy."

"May I come in?"

"Yes you may Percy." She stepped aside and let him in. "Do you have something to say?" She teased, loving having the upper hand. And she definitely owed him one after that carrying her over his shoulder incident.

"Umm yes, I mean," He stopped himself. Stuttering was not his style. He hadn't stuttered since asking Penelope out in his fourth year. Not that he'd actually had any women since Penelope, but men did not stutter!

Hermione smiled, "Yes?"

"Damn it Hermione." He placed his hands on her arms and shoved her against the wall. He pressed himself against her and breathed against her mouth, "I like you."

She was breathless, "Really? I would have never known."

"Shut up please." He said as he pressed his lips against hers. She made a noise in the back of throat and buried her hands in his hair, pulling it slightly. He gasped against her lips and she took the initiative to slowly start exploring his mouth. He grabbed her hips and pulled her against him as her lips trailed down his throat. She flipped them over so that he was against the wall, "This has got to come off." She began to claw at his shirt as a slow burn started low in her belly.

He helped her divest him of his shirt while removing hers in the process. He bit her neck, making her gasp in pleasure. He kissed her hard and long before he moved her toward the couch. Pushing her onto it he climbed on top of her, grinding his hardness into her.

She gasped at the feel of him, before pulling him down to continue the kiss. She rolled her hips as he worked on her bra. She tried to get to the zipper of his pants when she turned the wrong way and he ended up on the floor, "Ow." He muttered.

She put her hands on her head and breathed. "Wow."

He rubbed his head and looked at her sheepishly. "Well that was interesting."

She looked at him on the floor and giggled, "Yeah."

"I think I should go."

Her face fell, "Oh."

"But umm…" he grabbed his shirt, "What are you doing tomorrow?"

She smiled, "Having dinner with you?"

He smiled and kissed her hand. "If you want?"

She blushed, "I want."

"Then I'll see you tomorrow." He said as he prepared to apparate. "And Hermione?"

She looked up from putting on her shirt, "Yes?"

"One for the road?" He asked.

She smiled and kissed his cheek, "Goodnight Percy."

"Goodnight Hermione."


End file.
